This post is inspired by the beauty of the New Year and the reflections of last year.
When I stepped into 218, I wanted to look back to see what I was up to but found it challenging as it really seemed like a blur. Where did time go? What did I do last year? Did I achieve anything? It was quite a revelation to see that I truly had no idea how to answer these questions…ever dealt with this scenario? I can not remember the last time I felt this way because I love celebrating- even the smallest accomplishments hence I can usually find some sort of documentation. I failed to do that last year.
The thing is, I took a step back in 2017. I learned new skills. I found new passions. I abandoned my initial goals and set off on a journey of self-discovery, mostly undocumented. I kind of distanced myself from friends and family – this was unintentional. I went into an extreme introvert mode. I had not intended for this to ever happen, but I was feeling as if though I was moving forward for the sake of moving but without direction. I was inspired by one thing one minute and another thing the next and without ever completing the first thing I would push forward to wherever my magpie tendencies took me…and in the end, I felt overwhelmed and a bit lost.
Alas - 2017 was not a complete loss…
The one thing that I accomplished last year was probably coming to the realization that I am a creator at heart. I need to create to feel fulfilled and I need to go about it privately. I need to make time to tackle new skills and create projects around this undertaking, very much like following a school curriculum. Working on one thing or one skill at a time long term, simply will not work for me. This probably sounds like a recipe for disaster in the sense that I may never be a true master at any one thing, instead, I will be more of a generalist. In saying that, I think that I will be okay in the end. My overall goal in life has always been to be happy. To lead a happy life. I think that by embracing my magpie tendencies instead of fighting them, I will be much happier. Lucky for me, I have a wonderful support system that inspires me to drive forward.
More Realizations From 2017
It is okay to take a step back from the internet and relationships.
Sometimes you need to go back to move forward. It is difficult to do or think of, especially as it relates to relationships. Relationships are delicate and need to be continuously nurtured, however, I truly believe that giving your loved one’s space to do and grow for themselves without your guidance, as much as you want to provide it, is okay and can do wonders for your connection in the end.
I think that internet addiction is a real thing. I think that I suffer from it. The thing is, it is so vast! It is ever-changing, and it is so helpful. I love being online and I love connecting with people. I think that for me it has become a problem when I go about it without a goal in mind. When my main purpose to going online is to be diverted for a little bit, I can easily fall into a black hole of endless clicking. As you can imagine, this often results in a massive time suck. Taking a step back and assessing why I need to log on has really helped me stay on track and avoid the black hole.
A good workout does not need to be intense.
I am a recovering runner. If you are or were a runner you may understand my sentiments and struggles. I was a runner from the age of 16 to well into my late 20’s. Letting go of it as my main workout has been difficult, to say the least as the rush running provides is in a league of its own. It is magical and addictive. However, running is tough on the joints – ankles, knees, pelvic joints have all given me issues at one point or another. Last year I especially struggled with my knees, and this really scared me. It made me come to terms that I need to change my perspective when it comes to working out. I needed to find something that I enjoyed, that was effective, and that I could take part in without fear of damaging my body. Enter Rodney Yee’s yoga videos. He fueled my love for yoga.
Yoga is challenging, exciting and inspiring. I love how it makes me feel and I love what it has done for my body. At this point, I still feel as if at the beginning of my journey. I hope that by the end of this year I will be more advanced and able to do a headstand. (Fingers crossed!)
Diet is a lifestyle.
So…right before my wedding, back in 2015, I gained a lot of weight. Most brides lose weight, I gained it…I just was not expecting to be invited to so many celebratory parties in my honor. There were so many treats and lovely different foods-I could not help myself hence I was constantly overindulging. Soon enough, I found that I was overindulging during every meal. Overindulgence became my mode of operandi; my lifestyle.
2017 was the year I finally decided to reassess my relationship with food. I love good food and I can not deprive myself of indulging every now and then in delightful naughtiness, but it cannot be a constant. My diet has become a conscious lifestyle where overindulgence is the one thing I can not practice. Once my body tells me that it is satisfied, I step away. This practice has allowed me to shed a few pounds. My new goal for 2018 is to find foods that can step in as healthy addictive alternatives to less healthy delights.
How was your 2017? What did you discover about yourself? What are you most looking forward to this year? I would really love to know.
P.S. If you have an Instagram account, please follow me. I would love to stay in touch with you.